NLP techniques are so useful when we realise that we have all been there, full of self-doubt, wondering whether we are really good enough to belong to this or that, try this or the other and fear that if we go ahead and fail, we may look stupid in the eyes of other people.
These fears stop us from auditioning for parts in plays, prevent us from learning to dance, speaking or singing in public, put us off having a trial for our favourite sports team, trying for promotion, a new job or starting up in business and countless other things we would just love to do.
Inaction breeds doubt and fear
Action breeds confidence and courage
Rather than take action,or seek something like NLP techniques, most people will just hesitate. “I’m not quite feeling at my best just now.
When I feel a hundred per cent, I’ll think about doing it.” But that day never comes, of course. “I can’t do it right now, I’ll be letting somebody-or-other down.” That’s quite a common excuse.
“I couldn’t possibly change my job at my age. I’m too old to learn new things and, anyway, I couldn’t possibly give up my job security.” As you will read elsewhere in these pages, you’re never too old to learn and job security is merely an illusion.
There is a great comfort in doing nothing, believing those who are successful have just struck it lucky or have some inbuilt ability with which they were gifted at birth.
It gives you free membership of the Moaners, Whiners and Envy Club where you can whinge with like-minded people about the luck of others and never have to get off your own backside, use initiative and think for yourself.
If you have read other pages on this site, you should know by now that there are positive things such as NLP techniques and hypnosis that you can do to help yourself, things you can do to change your life for the better, if you really want change. So, if it is worth doing, it is worth getting on with it.
If you have not heard about NLP Anchors yet, now is the time to shoot to that page and familiarise yourself. NLP anchors are among the most useful NLP techniques.
When you understand anchoring and have practised it, you can then move on with this next exercise. If you can do the exercise with a friend, so much the better.
Firstly, think of a time when you had a block on something you wanted to do.
Perhaps you couldn’t bring yourself to apply for the promotion you really felt you deserved, or you couldn’t motivate yourself to go to the gym and get into shape.
Picture it very clearly in your mind. Feel the feelings you associated with it at the time. Listen to any sounds associated with it. As soon as it is really clear, anchor it on some part of your body.
Think of any other times you had a block and perform the same routine of seeing it, feeling it and hearing it, and stack the anchors in the same position.
Then think of the desire and frustration you felt at not doing these things and stack those anchors.
Now, think of a time when you actually did go for something you wanted.
You may have to dig deep and it may not seem significant to you now, but there was a time in your life when you did that.
Make a large picture in your mind, see what you saw, hear what you heard and feel what you felt.
Make the picture a movie and see yourself going for whatever it was.
Let the feeling of satisfaction overwhelm you, and as it does so anchor it on a different part of your body.
The next stage is to fire the first anchor and, as you do so, think of the times when you blocked yourself from going for it.
As that feeling builds up inside you, fire the second anchor and hold both anchors together for a moment before releasing the first anchor.
Now fire the first anchor and hold it until it triggers desire and frustration and then fire those anchors and as the feelings build, hold and fire the second anchor.
Repeat that process until you feel a real desire to take action.
Another powerful exercise for removing blocks was designed by Stephen J Ruden and Ronald A Ruden, so although it is a sound technique it cannot properly be described as an NLP technique.
It is called havening, and I first saw it performed successfully at a seminar by Paul McKenna.
Like all the exercises I suggest, please read the instructions through from beginning to end to make sure you understand them fully before starting the exercise.
You may need to go over it a few times but the effort will reward you and you will also find it very relaxing.
Firstly, think about the block you have and consider how badly you feel about it.
Rate that on a scale of 1 to 10 (10 being the worst) so that you can measure your improvement.
Now clear your mind and think of something pleasant.
Next use both hands and tap on both your collar bones.
While you continue tapping on both collar bones, keep your head still, look straight ahead and close and open your eyes.
While you continue tapping and holding your head still, look down to the left and then down to the right.
Keep tapping. Keep your head still. Move your eyes in a full circle clockwise and then anti-clockwise.
Next, cross your arms, place each hand on the top of your shoulders and close your eyes.
Stroke your hands down the sides of your arms from your shoulders to your elbows and back again and again.
As you stroke the sides of your arms, imagine you are walking down a flight of stairs and count out loud from 1 to 20 with each step you take. When you reach 20 hum or sing the first two or three lines of Happy Birthday.
Let your arms go back down to your sides, relax, open your eyes and look up in front of and above you. Then move your eyes slowly from left to right and back three times.
Close your eyes, breathe in deeply, exhale and stroke your arms again in the same fashion a further five times.
Open your eyes. Think about your block and rate your block on the scale of 1 to 10 and see how much it has reduced. If it is not reduced as far as you would like it to be, repeat the exercise from beginning to end.
It is worth adding that you can perform this exercise in almost any stressful situation you can imagine like, for example, going to the dentist or before you are about to speak in public.
It is well worth practising it and practising it until it becomes second nature. It may also become your best friend.
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