Our competition title “My path to success” enabled our winner, Kristi Bains to progress yet another step along her particular success route.
Now read what Kirstie has to relate:
“I am a woman with a traumatic past. I battled panic attacks, chronic anxiety and post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) for many years.
I am just now, at the age of 46, understanding the full extent of the possibilities of success and happiness in life.
It is not about waiting for the storm to pass; it is about learning to dance in the rain
In 2012 I entered a support group and spent two years mulling over why I could not be around people and why my past continued to haunt me.
Then the group leader, who is now a close friend, asked me a question: “What would it look like to have coffee with Kathy?”
That question stunned me for a while. It slowly dawned on me that I had come to trust another member of the group.
Trust had been my brick wall, but at that moment I could actually picture having coffee with Kathy and feeling safe.
I went with Kathy to a women’s retreat and began to break the barrier between myself and the world.
This April, at another women’s retreat without her, I was mistaken for a counsellor by a mental health professional as she witnessed me speaking in a small group to other women with issues. She suggested I become a life coach.
I have recently completed 62 hours of accredited training and am now coaching with NLP in my work place and on behalf of a not-for-profit organisation.
I also joined Toastmasters and have given my third speech which would not have been possible if I had not become aware of my limiting beliefs.
I realised that I truly do have control of my circumstances and thoughts. There has been a spectacular change in me since being asked what something would “look like”.
In reading the articles on the Secret of Mindpower & NLP website, I can really see and feel the possibilities of success using the timeline exercises.
My path to success is in the realisation of my mission and purpose and, most of all, my abilities to utilise the mind that God has given me in spite of the world we live in.”
So what is holding you back? Is it fear of failure. Is it fear of looking silly in front of others? Is it a general anxiety state, or something else?
Deep down all of us long to achieve something – some goal, some dream we’ve always had – but the majority of people find there is something holding them back.
For as long as I have known him, Jeremy has told me and his other friends that he is writing a book.
He produces draft after draft. This has been going on for years. He takes time off from his small business and tells all around him that he has to finish his book.
We used to take him seriously, but now friends wink or raise their eyebrows when the subject is mentioned.
You see, Jeremy has been to writers’ conferences and been interviewed by agents. Agents telephone him but he loses their telephone numbers and doesn’t call them back.
He has even been approached by publishers who wish to see a draft of his book so they may consider publication. But Jeremy never delivers.
What is holding him back? He tells everyone that he is just waiting to get his book published.
He has completed scripts – I have seen them – but then he decides to rewrite them and they never see the light of a publisher's office.
I wonder if Jeremy has ever imagined what it would look like to see his book in print.
I wonder if he has ever imagined what it would feel like to hold that published book in his hand.
I wonder if Jeremy has ever imagined what it would sound like to hear people talking enthusiastically about his latest book.
You see, if we don’t see ourselves doing it, or feel the feelings associated with whatever it is, or hearing the sounds associated with it, the reality of that success is a long way off.
The principles I am about to relate can be applied to anything. Let us take as an example, that you wish to become a teacher.
First of all, imagine yourself teaching in a real setting. If you wish to teach in a first grade school, imagine yourself there.
If you wish to be a University professor, imagine yourself there. See yourself doing the job: talking to students; marking their work; listening to their questions; feeling their anxieties.
Then consider what it is you have to do to become a teacher. Maybe you have some qualifications already. Maybe you have none.
Work backwards. If you need a university degree to teach – as I imagine you would – see yourself doing the course and go through the various steps I have already mentioned.
Go back a stage and see yourself applying for university and going through the whole process: filling out the application form, being interviewed, receiving the offer of a place.
Before you reach the stage of applying to go to university, do you need to get some other qualification? If you do, repeat the whole process again.
See yourself passing those examinations. See yourself undertaking the course to get there. Feel the experiences associated with that. Hear the encouragement of those around you.
Go through each step backwards until you are back at the present moment. You now know exactly what to do, how it will look, how it will feel and what it will sound like.
All you have to do now is act. If you start saying to yourself, “Ah, well, it will take years” then you had better act quickly.
The quicker you act, the sooner your will reach your goal, and the sooner you reach your goal the more fulfilled you will become.
Remember, the time will pass anyway, and if you sit around doing nothing you will be asking yourself the same questions in 1 year’s time, 2 year’s time, 3 year’s time and so on, and you will just build up regrets for failing to act.
Kristi conquered her difficulties and overcame her fears. Many of us have. Understand that you can too.
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